A new friend

There was this woman Shelly some of my friends were friends with.  I would see her occasionally at social events, we were friends on Facebook, but honestly didn’t know her.  Not well.  Not at all really.

When Enoch died she reached out.  She came to the funeral, I think in part because several of her friends were impacted by it.  I didn’t get a chance to say hello, but she sent me the sweetest text between the funeral and the funeral dinner.  I distinctly remember reading it in the car as we drove that short distance.

The texts and messages didn’t stop that day.

A few months later she lost her brother suddenly and unexpectedly.  It was a funeral I had to got to.  I remember her walking up to me as soon as she saw me with tears streaming down her face asking in great disbelief “why would you come?” I told her I needed to, I needed to hug her and see her and support her the same way she had supported me up until that point.  Plus I understood some of the shock and unbearable pain she was experiencing.

Since then we have continued to walk this grief journey together.  Each journey looking a little different, but grateful for someone else  who “gets it.”

Often, when it feels like nobody else will get the feeling of that day.  I send her a text.  This is one I sent just last week…”Today I went to the church for the first time since Enoch’s funeral. It was for a breakfast and the triggers were unexpected and a little intense. Now all I want to do is drink and eat and throw things.  I figured you would get that.”

She never has some magical answer or insight, but often her response is one of understanding and for that I’m grateful!

Last week I received this text from Shelly, “Hi friend. It just occurred to me that one of the most beautiful things that has come out of the tragedy of my brothers death is your sweet friendship. I love you!”

This was not how we anticipated becoming friends… but I am thankful!

IMG_9941 (1).jpg

Just weeks before Enoch was born this picture was taken, Shelly (on right) and I together in one of these random social settings.

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